Children must learn in advance to avoid being left behind

Mao Liping, 41, is a stay-at-home mother of 6- and 16-year-old sons in Shanghai.

I have learned through bringing up my two sons that children's education has changed quite a lot over the past 10 years.

My 16-year-old boy did not learn any pinyin or math before primary school, but did not fall behind academically. However, if children do not learn in advance today, it will be impossible for them to catch up with the others.

My younger son is now in the first grade, where English teachers skip the alphabet and start with reading texts. Both local and foreign teachers only speak English during English classes. How can a child survive if he or she doesn't learn in advance?

Parents have a strong competitive instinct, and many believe that their kids will only outperform others when they learn more, and do so earlier.

When my elder boy was in primary school, some parents often asked for a couple of days' leave to take their children on trips. Parents don't do this nowadays. Many still send their children to school when the kids are running a fever. Study is the top priority.

My younger son now has more than 10 school assignments every day and I help him, spending around one and a half hours finishing them before dinner. But most children whose parents both work only start doing their homework after the parents arrive home from work, and go to bed after 9:30 pm.

Various online courses have also increased anxiety and led to parents becoming highly involved in their children's studies. When parents see their peers subscribing to classes for their children and sharing the results on social media, many feel the competitive pressure.

Another factor that has increased parental anxiety is that they do not know exactly how their children are performing academically in this highly competitive environment.

Teachers give grades, rather than scores, in primary school tests, and most children get straight As. The only solution for parents is to sign their children up for more courses to ensure that they are learning more and earlier than others.

Before my elder son attended primary school, I had a highly-paid job and was busy with work. I switched to a job in which I earned about 200,000 yuan a year ($29,821 at today's rates) when he became a first-grader. When I was pregnant with my second child, I decided to become a stay-at-home mother.

It is not unusual for women to sacrifice careers for their children's futures. However, a lot of women are not willing to have a second child because of the sheer hard work involved in being a mother.

In addition to their traditional maternal roles, they need to show great patience and perseverance when accompanying their children in learning and doing school assignments.

They must learn how to master the skills of comparing the advantages and disadvantages of different out-of-school educational institutions, and know how to choose the best teachers and curriculum to suit their child.