Dying to lose weight
Behind a healthy goal of bringing trim and fit may lurk something more sinister－an obsession that ends up with some fighting to stay alive, or worse, Zhang Lei reports.
Zhang Qinwen's fainting happened in a flash. Opening her eyes in confusion, she found herself lying on the ground surrounded by people, and her head covered with blood. As she was too thin and could not be treated with anesthetics, the doctor could only cut off her head skin, and stitch it later directly.
At the time, Zhang had not eaten normally for more than two years, as if "I had fallen into a huge black hole, and food was the devil in my eyes," she later recalled and told media.
"I really want to eat, but when I eat, I can't think about it, and I want to die. Because there is a voice in my heart saying that it is the devil."
In her early 20 she was losing hair, her skin was peeling, she had age spots and abnormal menstruation, and it was difficult for her to climb stairs. Zhang's parents had kept an eye on her every day to ensure she ate, even if it was only two small pieces of biscuit and half a cup of skimmed milk. She would cry all afternoon, and finally eat while crying. In the tense atmosphere of home Zhang easily quarreled with her parents over trivialities. Disgusted with herself, she often hid under the table, behind curtains or in the corner.
Zhang felt those days were like being in a sandstorm, knowing that her parents were right but all the same not accepting food, and being wracked by contradictory thoughts.
