Resisting parents' pressure to wed requires patience and strategy

Luo Aiping, author of The World Is So Big, I Want to Stay Single－Tips to Resist the Pressure to Marry. [Photo provided to China Daily]

Luo Aiping's new book that came out just before the Spring Festival is timely. That's because many unwed adults face the greatest pressure to get married from their parents during the annual family-reunion period.

The World Is So Big, I Want to Stay Single－Tips to Resist the Pressure to Marry tells singles how to tackle such pressure from parents, relatives, colleagues and friends. It offers practical suggestions for dealing with different situations.

"Young people long for freedom and want to seize the decision-making power in marriage amid social development," says the lawyer from Guangdong's provincial capital, Guangzhou.

The unwed 39-year-old speaks from experience.

"Traditional Chinese filial piety means respecting and obeying parents. But I think the real filial piety should be the pursuit of one's own happiness because all parents want their kids to be happy. Parents and children should be equals."

Luo coauthored the book Investigation into China's Leftover Women in 2014.

She found parents employ different methods to urge adult children to marry, and this can cause friction. This inspired her new book.

Those who live with their parents face the greatest pressure because their parents can harangue them whenever they like, especially when attending others' weddings or when neighbors ask about their kids' marital aspirations.

Technology enables parents who don't live with their kids to harass them by phone or online messages. But pressure peaks when the children return home to spend days face-to-face with their folks.