女漢紙：我不需要男人的11個理由

　　Here are the 11 reasons a woman can do perfectly well without a man. Whether you're married or single, they're sure to strike a chord.

　　以下就是女人沒有男人也可以棒棒噠的11個理由。不論你是結婚了還是單身狗，它們都一定會引起你的共鳴。

　　1. The TV remote control is a device that changes channels — it is not a life-support system. I do not need a man who thinks it is and has to have it prised out of his hands.

　　電視遙控器是用來換頻道的設備——它不是個生命維持系統！我不需要一個這樣想的男人，還總是把遙控器攥在手里緊緊不放！

　　2. I like my bathroom sink to be sparkly and clean. I do not need a man to leave foamy bristles all over it.

　　我就是喜歡亮閃閃的干凈的浴室。我不需要男人把沾滿泡沫的胡須毛發掉一地。

　　3. I can cook a meal without using every pot and pan in the kitchen. I don't need a man to turn it into a bombsite.

　　我用不著用上廚房里的所有盆和所有鍋來做一頓飯！我不需要個男人把廚房變成爆炸屋！

　　4. I don't need a man to come home and spend two hours telling me about his day without once asking me about mine.

　　我不需要一個男人踏進家門就喋喋不休兩個小時，告訴我他的一天如何如何，卻一次也沒問過我！

　　5. Laundry needs to be done on different wash cycles. I don't need a man to ruin my cashmere by not reading the labels.

　　洗衣服需要用不同的洗滌圈數(指洗衣機功能)。我不需要一個男人看也不看標簽就把我的羊毛衫洗壞了！

　　6. When I can't do a DIY job, I admit it. I don't need a man to insist he can, then mess it up.

　　當我不會自己動手的時候，我就說我不會做。我不需要一個男人堅持說“我會我會！”……然后弄的一團糟。

　　7. When I can't open a tight jar, I stab the lid, release the pressure — and hey presto. No man required.

　　當我打不開密封罐頭的時候，我把蓋子刺個洞，釋放壓力——你看，變！根本不需要男人嘛。

　　8. When my clothes feel tight, I know I've gained weight. I don't need a man to point it out, grab rolls or tell me I'm 'so cuddly'.

　　當我的衣服變緊的時候，我知道我重了！我不需要一個男人為我指出，奪走我的面包卷，或是告訴我是那么的“惹人想抱”！

　　9. Sometimes it's nice to watch a cheesy, romantic movie at the cinema. I don't need a man to sit next to me, sighing, tutting and muttering 'for God's sake' all the way through.

　　有時候在電影院看看惡俗的愛情片挺好的。我不需要一個男人坐在我身邊，全程嘆氣，發出嘖嘖的不滿，還有發著“天哪”的牢騷。

　　10. Making a list and sticking to it is the fastest, most efficient way to get around a supermarket. I don't need a man to return home having bought nothing we need and 200 things we don't.

　　列一個清單，按單子購買是最快的、最高效的超市購物方案。我不需要一個男人回家的時候給我買了一堆不需要的東西，而我們的必需品什么都沒買！

　　11. They're your family. I don't need a man who needs me to remember the birthdays of his parents, siblings, and nieces and to buy their Christmas presents.

　　他們是你的家人。我不需要一個男人要我記住他爹娘還有兄弟姐妹還有外甥們的生日，還要買圣誕禮物給他們！

（來源：滬江英語 編輯：祝興媛）